When I first glanced through this story in the Enquirer, I was like, “Eh, yeah right.” But the story is actually based on a factual event – Brad Pitt’s mother, Jane Pitt, bought a Bible for Angelina Jolie. Both The Enquirer and In Touch Weekly spoke to a salesclerk at a Springfield, Missouri Christian bookstore, and the salesman confirms that Jane did in fact buy a Bible, and she had it embossed with “Angelina Jolie”. Obviously, Jane Pitt is trying to bring her devilish, villainess of a future daughter-in-law IN LINE. While we now know that Jane Pitt is something of a fire-breathing conservative, I’m still having problems making the leap from “Jane Pitt is a conservative Christian lady who buys Bibles for her son’s bisexual baby-mama” to “Obviously, Jane hates Angelina and the feeling is mutual.”

Brad Pitt’s God-fearing mother Jane has ratcheted up the battle with Angelina Jolie by buying Jolie an engraved Bible as a wedding present, say sources.

“Jane bought the Good Book a couple of weeks ago to help save Angelina’s soul and bring her closer to God, but it’s turned into a disaster,” revealed an insider.

Kristopher Burnett, a sales clerk at Mardel Christian Bookstore in Springfield, Mo., told The Enquirer that he sold Jane the Bible and prayed with her for Brad and Angelina’s well-being. But after Angie heard about Jane’s prayer, she went crazy! Angelina, who was raised Catholic but adheres to no specific faith, took offense because it implied that she needed saving.

“Angelina was already furious with Jane, so this just added insult to injury,” said the insider.

Said the insider: “Angelina has always felt Jane looked down on her for a bisexual lifestyle, previous drug use and for being ‘the other woman’ in Brad’s marriage to Jennifer Aniston. If Brad doesn’t mediate soon, it’s going to totally sabotage his relationship with Angelina and his family.”

[From The Enquirer, print edition]

In Touch has more details about the Bible too – Jane paid $130 for it, the Bible has black leather binding, and Jane had the “Angelina Jolie” embossing done in “flowing gold script”. And Ol’ Kris Burnett spoke to In Touch too, saying, “We prayed with Brad’s mom and sister over the Bible, asking the Lord to lead the way in Brad and Angelina’s life.” Um… “asking the Lord to lead the way in Brad and Angelina’s life”?? Like the Lord isn’t already in their lives? Presumptuous.

So… does it follow that the gift of a Bible is automatically going to lead to tears, retribution, anguish and, as always, Brad sobbing in the corner? Eh. Brad and Angelina have been together for seven years. Angelina knows Jane is conservative and Christian at this point. I’m of two minds on this, actually – I think there’s a very good chance that Jane has nothing but the best, nicest intentions with this gift, and merely means to give Angelina a nice copy of the Bible, something that can passed down to her children. One the other side, I do think the gift is ripe for some bad interpretations, like Jane is passive-aggressively judging Angelina as a bad mother, as a wanton woman and as a person who presumably has her own faith and her own relationship with God already, but the relationship doesn’t count because NO BIBLE. And while I wouldn’t be upset if I (a theist with no particular belief system) was given a Bible in general, I kind of think a (new) Bible makes for a crappy, cheap wedding gift to give to your future daughter-in-law. It would be one thing if Jane was passing down a family Bible to future generations – but to get her a new one as a wedding gift? I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like the most generous gift (generous of spirit, I mean).

Oh, and the UK tabs are reporting that Angelina is pissed because Jane keeps buying girly, princess-y things for Shiloh. A source claims, “It’s well documented that Shiloh likes to dress like a boy. But Jane still insists on buying her fairy costumes and princess dresses, which Angelina finds very disrespectful.” EH. The source also says, “Brad and Angelina were devastated by Jane’s actions. They have worked hard campaigning for equality, working closely with Barack Obama. Angelina called Jane and told her she believes she’s setting a bad example for the kids.” Even bigger “eh”.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

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